Mongolia

"Travelling around Mongolia with your own car or motorcycle-without a driver-is not recomended.  What look like main roads on the map are often little more than tyre tracks in the dirt, sand or mud and there is hardly a signpost in the whole country."     *Lonely Planet 2008*   

Definitely true, especially when you choose roads barely marked on the map to begin with.  Sometimes we could scarcely discern the tracks we were trying to follow while at other times we were on 8 lane dirt highways-when one lane got too rutted people had simply made another!  When we first entered Mongolia we followed a fairly obvious track that ended abruptly in a huge fence, several hours later we disovered the impossiblity of driving in the dark when there is no road.  Poor Tadpole was driven halfway up a steep rocky hill, stalling continually in protest, she was then ploughed into a ridge leaving a large dent in her front (oops!).  We only managed to find the track again when another foolhardy car drove along it. In the morning we stumbled across the other Fiesta and set off in convoy.  Due to the nomadic nature of the people the roads are also nomadic meaning that many tracks lead to nowhere.  We navigated by compass and helpful shepherds, following tracks in the direction of their rather vague hand gestures.  Several times we had to push both cars out of the sand and rather worryingly at one point we ended up in a rocky canyon with definitely no track!  Tadpole continued to prove her amphibious nature, bravely fording no fewer than 4 rivers.  When it rained the tracks turned to mud baths that we slid rather than drove along praying that we wouldn't get stuck as no one was keen on the thought of pushing.

It wasn't long before we had our first offer of cheese and vodka at 10am in the morning-we needed both to try and cancel out the revolting flavours of each.  Vodka is a staple in the Mongolian diet and it didn't seem to matter what time of day it was at least half of the men we met would be drunk.  One night we made the mistake of camping too near a town and were soon joined by five young vodka bearing men trying to get us to join in whilst they downed half a bottle at a time seemingly to impress us-we moved our cars.  Everybody wanted to stop and talk to us whenever we stopped. We shared our tea with a nomadic family and gave cuddly toys to the children who were ecstatic. 

The other Fiesta (rather aptly named Shitbox) lost its exhaust and so sounded like an authentic rally car-unfortunately this gave the driver a headache so when we next hit civilisation we attempted to find a mechanic.  We were directed to a ger with several vehicles outside and managed to find a man who could barely stand due to the amount of vodka in his system.  Needless to say we were slightly alarmed when he started getting out welding equipment and rapidly retreated to a safe distance praying his breath wouldn't spontaneously combust as he proceeded to weld the exhaust back on.  This wasn't the end of the trouble for Shitbox, she needed more welding later on (thankfully by a sober man) as a rear suspension coil snapped and by the time we reached Ulaanbaatar her front wheels were barely being held on!  Tadpole on the other hand is a true soldier, all of her problems could be solved by turning the music up and singing louder (There is definitely something to be said for being cluless).

The scenery in Mongolia cannot be done justice with words but we'll vainly attempt to paint a picture for you (really you must visit). Think snow capped mountains, lush green valleys dotted with gers and full of purple flowers, herds of horses, yaks, cows, sheep and goats all attended by traditionally dressed shepherds on horses, alpine forests, stormy skies, vast lakes, eagles and buzzards swooping to within a few metres of the car and being able to see for miles without sighting a human.  We decided no visit to Mongolia could be complete without a night in a ger so we paid a visit to Khorgun Nuur National Park. Here we climbed an extinct volcano whose crater took our breath away (in more ways than one). Spending the night in a ger was bliss, lying horizontal was a strange sensation having slept in the car for so long it actually felt like we were tipped backwards and for the first time since arriving in Mongolia we didn't wake up freezing cold with blocks of ice for feet (the previous morning Hamish and Sara's tent zip had frozen closed). 

9 days after entering Mongolia we found ourselves on the approach to Ulaanbaatar.  Entering the city with emotions running high it was rather a culture shock to be faced with other cars, and plenty of them, naturally driving like maniacs.  At one point we nearly lost Shitbox to a bus.  Pulling up at Dave's bar we gratefully received our free beer and had a celebratory full english breakfast (despite it being four in the afternoon).  This morning we said a very fond farewell to Tadpole, our favourite car in the whole world, she looked slightly naked after we stole the number plates.  The next stage of our journey may prove the most perilous yet, on September 11th we are headed home in an Aeroflot Tupolev jet!

Tajikistan (Part 1)

We left Samarkand for the Tajikistan border where we were greeted by overly friendly border guards - their exact words were "Hello baby, where are your playboys?"  We're not so sure hysterical laughter was quite the reaction they were hoping for.  We left Uzbekistan with 'I love you baby' written on our car in tip-ex.  We set off naively hoping to reach Dushanbe that evening-little did we know what lay ahead....

The road rapidly disintegrated to a mountain track.  We ploughed on in the darkness but poor Tadpole came to a standstill half way up a steep slope which unfortunately was also rather narrow. We soon had two queues of lorries, one each way, honking madly at us.  Unable to start the car we were completely stuck until a friendly man from the red cross came to rescue us and helped us to push Tadpole worryingly close to the edge of the cliff! After 5 mins rest Tadpole was fine to continue and we set off agin.  Our next hurdle came in the form of a steep sandbank where a queue of cars and lorries waited to attempt it one at a time-we watched as one vehicle just kept sliding back down.  Foot pressed to the floor we prayed our way up and Tadpole the Heroine made it.  At midnight we admitted defeat and pulled off the road for the night.

We awoke to a flat tyre and a very kind trucker wouldn't let us change it ourselves. He then spent an hour and a half bending our sump guard back down-we have never seen anyone happier to be given $10 when he asked for nothing.  Not much further down the road we reached the tunnel of doom.  Tadpole proved her amphibious nature ploughing into the wheel arch deep water and keeping going for over 15mins with steam billowing from the bonnet she swept past conked out cars on either side and made it back into the sunlight.  We had only one more hiccup before Dushanbe-a boulder caught the underside of the car and rotated to lift us clean off the floor, it required 5 Chinese men to get us back down.  The road fortunately improved going into Dushanbe-we've never appreciated tarmac so much.

In Dushanbe we visited a mechanic who once again forced our bent sump guard back down and 'fixed' our back brake-its now worse! Everyone we spoke to told us not to attempt the Pamirs as we had no chance of making it in Tadpole.  After much debate we set off anyway, only to turn around 30mins down the road fearing that our chances of making Mongolia would be nil if we continued.  With heavy hearts we set off towards the nearer Kyrgystan border.  We decided to camp early and drove onto an idyllic 'beach'- 2 seconds later we sank! We were making great progress out with our helpful skateboards but unfortunately then fell in a sandpit.  Once again it took a team of men to rescue us and push us out of the hole!! Leaving Tadpole safely on the road we built a campfire and slept on the beach under phenomenal stars.  

Waking up in great spirits we set off only to stop a short way down the road with a very hot Tadpole.  Getting out the Haynes manual we diagnosed a broken fan and then felt  very pleased with ourselves when we managed to short circuit the thermostat thus solving the problem.  On reaching the Tajik border we were informed that Krygystan wouldn't let us in.  However Tajikistan were happy to let us out to try.  In the process they did a thorough search of the car and checked our arms for signs of heroin abuse! They also managed to swipe Lucy's phone but we couldn't prove anything as we had no signal to ring it.  It was a 20minute drive across a mountainous no mans land to the Krygystan border.  Despite 2 hours of pleading the man still insisted that we had to cross the Pamirs as this was a non international border- our pictures of cars blowing up in mountains didn't convince him although he did give us dinner because he felt sorry for us.  Eventually we gave up, he wrote 'I'm sorry' on the car and we headed back towards Tajikistan-passing two more rally cars off to try their luck en-route.  When we reached Tajikistan they refused us entry as we had been stamped out so laughing at the ridiculousness of the situation we sat at the stop sign and told them we were going to sleep here forever.  Eventually the other two cars also returned and a more senior official turned up, took our passports and  told us to follow him in his car. Twenty minutes down the road we stopped at a police out post where we each had to drink at least 2 shots of vodka and have our pictures taken before we were allowed to continue-clearly drink driving is not an offence in Tajikistan! Eventually we were sent on our way with passports still stamped out-we are now officially illegal immigrants-not quite as illegal as the guys we were with as their visas actually expired that day and the Pamir Highway is a 7 day drive!!

It was a days drive to get back to where we had left the road 2 days previously but we were much happier about attempting the highway 2nd time around with 2 teams of mechanically minded boys for company.  Also safe in the knowledge that we have to do it so if Tadpole doesn't make it it isn't due to our foolishness in attempting it! Unfortunately 2 police checkpoints later the boys with expired visas were detained-possibly for deportation-so once again we are on our own.  It seemed unlikely their cars were going to make it anyway- one of them had its exhaust strapped to the roof rack and the chassis was so bent the doors wouldn't shut!  However every rally team in Tajikistan now has no option but to do the highway so there are plenty of teams following up behind us. We spent most of today driving along the Afghan border taking care not to leave the road for fear of the landmines that we were warned about frequently on very graphic signs!

Wish us luck and pray for Tadpole to make it over 4000m passes in the next 4 days!!

 

Prague to Istanbul

In Prague we had a slıght  change of plan to our route- havıng looked at the map we decıded Vıenna was en route so we added a trıp to Austrıa to the ıtınerary. Havıng paınted the car wıthout thıs ın mınd some tıp-ex was necessary to make some addıtıons- you can always trust Tesco for the necessıtıes even ın the Czech Republıc! So off we headed to Vıenna, apparently a lıttle too quıckly as we got snapped by a speed camera ın a small town somewhere.

Wıth lıttle tıme to spare we dıd a whıstle stop drıvıng tour of Vıenna. Havıng carefully planned a route through the central sıghts, thıs was quıckly abandoned as we ended drıvıng down a pedestrıan street and beıng hastıly turned around by a polıce woman. The paınted car attracted a lot of attentıon whıch made us feel lıke celebrıtıes as we drove from Vıenna to Bratıslava. Wındows rolled down and 'Barbıe Gırl' blarıng out got us a lot of toots, waves and photos.

We departed Austrıa for Slovakıa and a faırly unınterestıng tour of Bratıslava (although we may have mıssed the centre!). Swıtchıng drıvers we motored on to Hungary aımıng for our forth cıty of the day- Budapest. Bee drove us over the Danube three tımes and parked us very ıllegally next to parlıament so we could leap out (Lucy ın bare feet) for a quıck photo. Gettıng out of Budapest proved to be a challenge- apparently tıny backstreets lead to the motorways. Even once we were out we had trouble stayıng on the motorway whıch seemed perıodıcally just to vanısh. Thıs would leave us ın the mıddle of random towns searchıng for sıgns- we went round one roundabout ın Szeged at least 10 tımes! We stopped for the nıght just before the Romanıan border ın an allotted trucker stop. Thıs caused a rally car about 30 mıns behınd us to pull over and check we were ok- not belıevıng that 2 gırls (by the way we rather stupıdly wrote '2 GIRLS, 1 CAR' on tadpole's back bumper) would voluntarıly choose to stop there.

The next mornıng we entered Dracula's land and wound our way through Transylvanıa avoıdıng polıce cars as we hadn't paıd the road tax. Romanıa has a surprısıng number of polıce cars and just to make thıngs even more scary they stıck cardboard cut out ones at the sıde of the road too! By the tıme ıt got dark ıt was raınıng- agaın- and ıt was provıng dıffıcult to see. Pullıng over at a servıces to wıpe the  wındscreen and lıghts we were helped by a kınd old man who enthusıastıcally trıed to clean the whole car. Hıs frıends then offered us a 'free' nıght ın theır motel! Unsurprısıngly we declıned and headed off towards Bucharest. The rıng road round Bucharest tested our sump guard for the fırst tıme. As the weather got worse we were desperately searchıng for somewhere to spend the nıght resultıng ın a nıght lıterally on the sıde of the motorway wıth lorrıes shakıng the car as they went past.

Enterıng Bulgarıa was quıte a challenge the next mornıng- not helped by mıstakıng a port for the border and beıng chased by Rabıd dogs as we looked for a brıdge. Apparently to get to Bulgarıa from Romanıa you have to be on one specıfıc road comıng ın one dırectıon only otherwıse there are no sıgns and Bulgarıa seems not to exıst at all. Once fınally ın Bulgarıa ıt was very agreeable- we even went for a walk up to a monument on a mountaın resultıng ın very achıng legs havıng not walked for a week. It was no problem fındıng the Turkısh border- evıdent by the huge traffıc jam. 3 hours later and starvıng hungry we were fınally devourıng our fırst Turkısh kebab.

Thıs mornıng we made ıt to Istanbul and now we're off to see the sıghts.